I want to write this before I get too busy with life so I can remember it well, though I know most things I will never forget.
Overdue by more than a week-I was pretty desperate to have this baby! Could not sleep well...slipping into the "ice cream medication" state to ease my woes and then Wednesday I finally started having contractions...it sounds crazy to be happy about being in pain but I was quite happy! I asked Kyle to pick up hot wings (because I have heard spicy food helps labor to start) so I would maybe continue having contractions-it worked ;) I had contractions consistently all night, sometimes close together, sometimes 20 minutes apart, never stopping though. We called our doula (I'm not good at explaining what the definition of a doula is but they coach you through your birth, start to finish and help make the atmosphere more relaxing and therefore help you focus on dealing with the stages of birth) and she came and stayed a while and massaged my feet and helped me with staying calm and breathing through contractions. She put on "zen music" and gave me a rice sock (which saved my sanity with the pain I felt in my back with each contraction). She left for a while so we could rest since neither Kyle or I had had much sleep that night and we called her when the contractions got closer together and stronger.
I want to stop right here and say that in all the time Kyle and I have been married he never ceases to amaze me-the birth of our daughter Isley was certainly no exception. Through the whole process he supported me in every way he could, physically and emotionally. I had UNBEARABLE pain in my back during each contraction and the only thing that made it tolerable was if someone put pressure on my back during the contraction. He sat with me and timed the contractions, held my back, massaged me when I needed it-and that was just in early labor. Once we got to the point where we needed to drive to Atlanta to go to the hospital I was 5-6 cm dilated and having strong contractions about every 3 minutes in the car-by the way, labor in the car and Atlanta traffic are not a good mix.
Bella spent the time we were away with her grandmothers and had a ball...though she did miss us I am told. I missed her SO much. I have never been away from her overnight, and two nights felt like eternity...I couldn't wait to get home and hold her, even though I knew she would only have interest for her new sister. The best part about having two kids so far? Watching Bella meet Isley. I swear it was like waking up Christmas morning and getting everything you wished for--THAT is how overthetop excited she was to meet "baby Iswee". She was standing at the window looking out as we came up the porch steps-clapping her hands and saying "baby Iswee?!!!" with the biggest smile in the world. As soon as we opened the door she wanted to hold her- she ran right past me (who, did I mention she has never spent the night away from?) and straight to her sister and laughed the most excited, happy laugh imaginable and hugged her and kissed her and wanted to "get out" of the carseat so she could hold her take care of her. I wish with all my might I could convey how proud that makes me of her...that her heart is so big and loving that we have to remind her to not show "too much" love because she wants to cover her with kisses and hugs! I will forever remember my favorite two girls being introduced-God is so good to me!
But, back to business. I made it to "almost" transition (7ish cm) and we had to decide if we would go to the hospital then or after rush hour...we chose then. Getting to the car was awful. Painful. NofunatALL. Riding in the care was worse. I didn't talk. At all. I breathed deeply a lot, I prayed for getting through traffic and not wrecking. I wanted to make a special lane for pregnant women in labor and get there NOW. We finally got there-Kyle parked the car in front, we weren't sure what to do so he went in to ask. They came back with a wheel chair-we had to go all the way around to the end of this insanely long ramp and I remember every bump hurting and I was exceedingly annoyed with every little crack in the sidewalk. Things like that infuriate you when you are in labor, fyi. My Mom was there-we didn't tell her to come but I'm glad she did. We got to the front desk and they kept asking when I was due, when we told them I was overdue they continued to try to get the specific DATE that I was due-because that's what you ask a pregnant lady who is in the middle of contractions that are coming VERY close together and in EXTREME pain. They wanted my social security number, my name, the list goes on-and all I wanted was to get out of the freaking wheelchair and into a bed away from bright lights and people.
Finally my doula convinced them to let me go to a room first and they could get the rest of the formal info after I got settled. They checked my cervix and I was 7-8 cm (Tracy, always the optimist says, we'll take 8!) And so, I took that 8 because "8" was my goal to get to without pain meds. I told myself (and Kyle) that if I could make it to 8, I read that was the worst pain and if I could handle that what was the point of getting pain medication? (yes, I am an all or nothing kind of girl). I'm not talking about without an epidural, I mean not one SINGLE Tylenol. I had my baby with NO pain medication. Please understand, that was NOT me that made that happen. It was all God. I have HORRID back labor and many times thought about getting medication but I was so very desperate to have a natural birth so that I wouldn't have the awful C-section side effects that I had with Bella's birth.
Side note: At this point I think Blythe arrived-she is our lovely photographer friend who photographed this whole glorious event-not really my style to photograph such a private moment since I am super private about these things but she had recently posted how much she wanted to do birth photography and here I was about to have a baby so I figured the worst that could happen is I would not want to look at the pics later (which is actually not true, I love the work she did and especially the moments captured after Isley came into the world). She was very discreet and left when I asked and was not invasive at all.
I didn't want to move from the bed but Tracy encouraged me to try other positions to speed the process along. That was VERY difficult for me to do. Having back labor so bad made me want to have something to press against my back HARD every time I had a contraction which means if I wasn't laying down someone had to be there putting that hard pressure on my back or I couldn't tolerate the pain. I tried several positions and they had to keep adjusting the baby heart monitor they kept trying to keep strapped to my belly (one of the joys of a VBAC birth-you have to have the baby monitored the whole time). The monitor wouldn't stay no matter what they did and so they told my midwife and she decided she would stay and hold the monitor herself so that I could move to whatever position I wanted to without a lot of fuss from the machines. Anjli was my midwife's name and she was an angel-she held that monitor for hours-never leaving my side. I have never heard of or seen such dedication from a doctor-only a true midwife would commit like that. It still blows me away. I have the utmost respect for her. Tracy never lost patience with me either (which is miraculous considering how stubborn I was about staying in the bed) and she knew just what to do to help me through each contraction. Kyle offered me water and kisses whenever it seemed I needed some extra support (which was most of the time) and I labored until we finally got past "transition" to the pushing part. I must say I didn't like transition AT ALL but pushing was super hard too...transition was still worse, just a different kind of pain.
I tried a few different positions for pushing. Between that and keeping in my mind on (hopefully) having a faster labor without medication I was pretty preoccupied for hours. 3 1/2 hours, a LOT of pushing and finally some yelling/praying and a little crying Isley entered the world. My Mom, Kyle, Tracy, Anjli, Blythe were so supportive and gracious-it was just amazing how surrounded I was with support and love during the whole process. Praise GOD for allowing me the birth I desired to have but even more that he kept Isley safe during the 3 1/2 hours of pushing (the cord was unknowingly wrapped around her neck). After she was born I got to hold her right away and I had that "whole world melts away" except for my Isley's beautiful face feeling. I don't remember the pain disappearing so much as I just was overpowered with joy that she was finally in my arms and safely delivered. Hard to believe we had gotten through the hardest most wonderfully mysterious things life has to offer together-it's still surreal. Kyle and I couldn't have been any more excited! We both held her (Kyle did not cut the cord-he doesn't like blood) and marveled at our tiny beauty. Anjli told me how proud she was of me and I remember thinking there wasn't anyone else I would have wanted delivering my baby-she was a saint. She would later tell me that Isley's birth was one of the most beautiful she had witnessed and that she would always remember it-I took that SO much to heart knowing she has delivered hundreds of babies and I am so thankful to God that he allowed me to share that connection with her.
Now Kyle will
not tell you that birth is beautiful, but it is a beautiful
thing and I could tell that he had a new found respect for me after going through that whole process in such a raw way. For weeks he would do anything I asked, without hesitation, offer to do things for me, waited on me hand and foot. Not that he doesn't already offer to do things or get things for me (he is pretty amazing) it was just an eagerness to serve me that I noticed as a side effect :)
So, there you have it, the story of our Isley Virginia's debut!
