Facebook is sort of like a social short cut. No phones necessary, not talking over the phone, and my personal favorite-no having to print a thousand REAL pictures so that your friends and family can see your recent adventures. Of course, even though there are thousands of words a day on facebook and twitter it's also SILENT. By that I mean you don't hear the stories that people don't tell. You don't hear the other kids SCREAMING in the background as that adorable picture of the baby is being taken. The context of those unbelievably perfect family pictures is not disclosed (usually). Sometimes I hate facebook as much as I love it. This is why-it makes us come across as if life just "happens" to be peachy-keen all the time. Don't get me wrong, I say promote the positive and keep the negative at bay but even research studies have shown people get envious, angry, hurt, competitive...over what they do see and think the rest of the world does not struggle like they do.
In real life, some things are fine to use a short cut: algebra, computers, links for websites, but there are some things in life that require a very long, tedious road traveled to arrive where you want to be. Beverly Sills puts it like this: "there are no shortcuts to any place worth going". I have found this to be true for most things in my life. When searching for my future husband-what a LONG, hard, tempting path that was to journey through. So many people taking shortcuts, telling me to not take it so seriously, to forsake my heart's desires for my body's pleasure. That waiting was...excruciating, at times. Worth it? Absolutely. Did I make mistakes? Absolutely! And even though I regret those mistakes you know what? Those mistakes helped me to see that I was not above temptation-that I was just as human as everyone else. For those of you reading that are on that journey still-trying to wade through the dangerous waters of being single in this fallen world, all I can tell you is that the shortcuts are not worth it-and though you have probably made mistakes try and remember that Jesus didn't focus on people's sin that were remorseful and wanted to change, he saw their heart and beckoned for them to turn from that life of pain and guilt and follow him instead. Everything you have done, He knows, and He still loves you-always has, always will. I know that we "know" that, but really, let that sink in. He loves ME. He knows every thought and desire and still, still I am welcome in His arms. I am amazed by that.
So where am I going with this? I am a parent now, well I have been for 2 years, 8 months and 7 days, before that even-ever since I was pregnant with Bella my whole world has changed. It's true what they say-having kids changes EVERYTHING. How I think, how I eat, who I like, who likes me (I can't tell you how many hundreds of people hold conversations with you when you are holding a cute baby on your hip). You think that it would wear off a bit once they get out of the "baby" stage-it doesn't. I check the labels on everything (just about). Because of my girls I cook healthy most of the time even though I am pretty certain Kyle and I could live off of Fajitas, ice cream, cereal and bagel bites for all eternity if given the option.
Now you could chalk this up to me being OCD or something-I'm not. What I am is a person who wants to give my children the best start to life they can have. I don't want to shelter them forever, or make all their decisions for them, or decide what college they will go to (or even if they go to college for that matter). It's bigger than that. I want to give them all the tools to have whatever life they could possibly want. Well, that's not true, I want to give them the tools to have the life CHRIST wants them to have-which is better than anything I or they could ever dream up. I know this because I am living proof. I dreamed up such a wonderful life for myself when I was growing up. I worked hard in school so I could get into some fabulously prestigious school-Harvard, Yale, whatever Ivy League I preferred. I would then meet the man of my dreams, travel around the world, do lots of missionary work, maybe write a few books and most of all make my MARK on this big world. Well, clearly my story did not play out quite that way. And boy am I glad! I certainly don't have that "picture perfect" life.
My days are filled with dirty diapers, blending sweet potatoes and getting baby food sneezed all over me. I have survived some tornado-sized tantrums with my two year old. I have been in tears more than once not knowing what to do next. BUT. Those long, hard days are worth it because parenting is like journeying to some place like the Grand Canyon....and then on to the next wonders of the world, each one more wonderful than the one before.
There are stretches of desert, sometimes you feel like you will never get to the end of the road you are on and then-you catch a glimpse of that view-only your view is seeing your child. Not seeing her on the outside only but realizing that, in that moment, she is the most perfect, wonderful, God-filled person on Earth and you realize she isn't part of your life, you are part of hers. You are helping to script her life so that she can go on to make her mark on the world. And all of a sudden all those long, hard hours and prayers and endless late night book reading on how-to's and what-to-do's to be the best parent you can muster on the 3 hours of sleep you are running on adds up to be worth it.
And you hold on to that moment in your heart, and you know that aside from finding love in your Best Friend, there is just no greater example of how to understand God's love. Because he sees us mess up over and over and over and you think-how can He love me? Because He is our Father. And good Fathers love ALL the time, and they rejoice when we get it right, and they are there to mend when our hearts get broken, and they are compassionate when we do things to break our own hearts. But God has that Grand Canyon, Big Picture view all the time and He knows that there are no shortcuts to our destination. On the contrary, that long journey is what binds us closer to Him, and to each other.
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